The short answer

Good wedding invitation wording says who is hosting, who is getting married, when and where, what to wear, and how and by when to reply, in a tone that matches the day. Formal invitations name the hosts first; casual ones can simply say you're getting married. Keep registry details for your website or an insert card.

Wedding invitation wording has one job: to tell people who is hosting, who is getting married, when and where, what to wear, and how and by when to reply. The tone should match the wedding. A black-tie dinner and a spit braai on a farm shouldn’t sound the same on paper.

Below are copy-ready examples for the common situations, Afrikaans versions with English translations, and the small lines that cause the most trouble: RSVPs, dress codes, gifts and children.

What every wedding invitation needs to say

Whatever the style, check that yours covers:

  • Who’s inviting. Your parents, both families, or the two of you.
  • Who’s getting married. First names only on a formal card when your surname matches the hosts’; full names otherwise.
  • The day, date and time. If you want people seated by 15:15 for a 15:30 ceremony, say so rather than printing a false start time.
  • Where. The venue and town, plus a map pin for farms and beaches, where a street address won’t help.
  • What follows the ceremony. “Reception to follow” if it’s in the same place; the reception venue if it isn’t.
  • The dress code, if you have one.
  • How and by when to reply. A date, plus a name, number or link.

Everything else (accommodation, directions, shuttle times, the registry) belongs on an insert card or your wedding website.

Formal wedding invitation wording (parents hosting)

Formal invitations are written in the third person, with the hosts first. In American etiquette, as the Emily Post Institute explains, “request the honour of your presence” is used for a ceremony in a church or other house of worship, and “request the pleasure of your company” for anywhere else. It isn’t a South African rule, and few guests will notice either way.

The bride’s parents hosting

Johan and Marietjie van der Merwe
request the honour of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
Anika
to
Pieter Botha
on Saturday, the thirteenth of March
two thousand and twenty-seven
at half past three in the afternoon
[Church], Humansdorp
and afterwards at [venue]

Both families hosting

Johan and Marietjie van der Merwe
and Danie and Elsa Botha
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their children
Anika and Pieter
on Saturday 13 March 2027 at 16:00
[Venue], Jeffreys Bay

If parents are divorced and both are hosting, give each their own line, with a new spouse alongside if they’re co-hosting too.

Wording when the two of you are hosting

When you’re paying for the wedding yourselves, or simply prefer it, the invitation can come from the two of you. “Together with their families” includes your parents warmly without naming them as hosts.

Together with their families
Anika van der Merwe and Pieter Botha
invite you to celebrate their marriage
on Saturday 13 March 2027 at 16:00
[Venue], St Francis Bay
Dinner and dancing to follow

Casual wedding invitation wording

For a relaxed farm, garden or beach wedding, write the way you talk.

We’re getting married!
Anika and Pieter
Saturday 13 March 2027, 16:00
[Farm], outside Humansdorp
A short ceremony, a spit braai and dancing until late.
Let us know by 31 January if you can make it.

Beach and destination wedding invitations

A beach invitation has to work harder. Guests need to know exactly where to go, where to park, what to put on their feet, and that it gets cold on this coast once the sun drops.

Anika and Pieter are getting married on the beach
Saturday 13 March 2027 at 16:30
[Beach], Jeffreys Bay (map pin on our website)
Dinner follows at [venue], five minutes’ drive away
Dress: beach formal. Flat shoes or bare feet for the sand,
and a warm layer for after sunset.
Please reply by 15 January 2027.

If many guests are travelling from Gauteng, the Western Cape or overseas, give them more notice, and put places to stay, the drive from the airport and any shuttle on your website rather than the card. See when to send save-the-dates and invitations for lead times.

Reception-only invitations

If you married quietly (at Home Affairs, abroad or with only your parents present) and are celebrating later, say so plainly so nobody arrives expecting a ceremony.

Anika and Pieter were married quietly in October 2026
and would love to celebrate with you.
Saturday 13 March 2027 from 18:00
[Venue], Jeffreys Bay
Food, drinks and dancing. Please reply by 31 January.

Afrikaans wedding invitation wording (with English translations)

Afrikaans invitations read best when they’re written in Afrikaans from the start, not translated line by line from English. Choose between u (formal and respectful, good for church weddings and older relatives) and jy or julle (warmer and more personal), and stick to it. For a bilingual guest list, print the two languages side by side. See also Afrikaans wedding traditions.

Formal, parents hosting

Johan en Marietjie van der Merwe
nooi u hartlik uit na die huwelik van hul dogter
Anika
met
Pieter Botha,
seun van Danie en Elsa Botha,
op Saterdag 13 Maart 2027 om 15:30
in [kerk], Humansdorp.
Die onthaal volg by [onthaalplek].
Laat Marietjie asseblief teen 31 Januarie 2027 weet of u kan kom: [nommer]

English: Johan and Marietjie van der Merwe cordially invite you to the marriage of their daughter Anika to Pieter Botha, son of Danie and Elsa Botha, on Saturday 13 March 2027 at 15:30 at [church], Humansdorp. The reception follows at [venue]. Please let Marietjie know by 31 January 2027 whether you can attend: [number].

The two of you hosting

Saam met ons ouers nooi ons julle uit na ons troue.
Anika en Pieter
Saterdag 13 Maart 2027 om 16:00
[Plek], St. Francisbaai
Kleredrag: netjies informeel
Laat ons asseblief teen 31 Januarie weet of julle kan kom.

English: Together with our parents, we invite you to our wedding. Anika and Pieter, Saturday 13 March 2027 at 16:00, [venue], St Francis Bay. Dress: smart casual. Please let us know by 31 January whether you can come.

Casual

Anika en Pieter gaan trou.
Saterdag 13 Maart 2027, 16:00
[Plaas], buite Humansdorp
Kom eet, kuier en dans saam met ons tot laat.
Laat weet asseblief teen 31 Januarie of julle kom.

English: Anika and Pieter are getting married. Saturday 13 March 2027, 16:00, [farm], outside Humansdorp. Come and eat, catch up and dance with us until late. Please let us know by 31 January whether you’re coming.

Reception only

Ons het in Oktober 2026 in die kleinste kring getrou
en wil dit nou graag saam met julle vier.
Saterdag 13 Maart 2027 vanaf 18:00
[Plek], Jeffreysbaai

English: We married quietly in October 2026 and would now love to celebrate with you. Saturday 13 March 2027 from 18:00, [venue], Jeffreys Bay.

RSVP, dress code, gift and children lines

RSVP lines

Give a firm date, a name and a way to reply. Set the date a week or two before your caterer needs final numbers, so there’s time to chase the stragglers. (“Please RSVP” technically means “please please reply”, but nobody minds.)

  • Please reply by 31 January 2027 to Anika on [number].
  • RSVP with your meal choice and any dietary requirements at [link].
  • We have reserved two seats in your honour. Please reply by 31 January.
  • Afrikaans: Laat ons asseblief teen 31 Januarie weet of julle kan kom, en of julle enige dieetvereistes het. (Please let us know by 31 January whether you can come, and whether you have any dietary requirements.)

Dress code lines

  • Dress: black tie. / Dress: formal. / Dress: smart casual.
  • The ceremony is on grass, so block heels or flats will save your shoes.
  • Beach formal: light fabrics, flat shoes for the sand and a jacket for when the sun goes down.
  • Afrikaans: Die seremonie is op die sand. Los dus die hoëhakskoene by die huis. Bring ‘n baadjie vir die aand, want dit raak koel wanneer die son sak. (The ceremony is on the sand, so leave the high heels at home. Bring a jacket for the evening, because it gets cool when the sun sets.)

If guests ask what a dress code means, point them to our guide on what to wear to a wedding.

Gift lines

Formal etiquette keeps the registry off the invitation itself. America’s Emily Post Institute is firm that it belongs on your wedding website or an enclosed card instead. You needn’t be that strict, but it does keep the invitation uncluttered. Keep the wording short, and never make it sound like an entry fee.

  • If you’d like to give a gift, our registry is at [retailer] under “Van der Merwe and Botha”.
  • Your company is the best gift. If you’d like to give something, a contribution towards our first home would be very welcome.
  • We’re saving for a honeymoon in [place]. If you’d like to help, the details are on our website.
  • Your company really is all we’d like. No gifts, please.
  • Afrikaans: Julle teenwoordigheid is vir ons die mooiste geskenk. As julle ons tog met iets wil seën, sal ‘n bydrae tot ons wittebroodsreis baie waardeer word. (Your presence is the loveliest gift to us. If you’d still like to bless us with something, a contribution towards our honeymoon would be much appreciated.)

Put banking details on your website, or send them when guests ask, rather than printing them on the invitation. For the practical side, see how wedding gift registries work in South Africa.

Children and plus-one lines

The names on the envelope or the WhatsApp message tell guests who’s invited, so write them out in full: “Johan, Marietjie, Lize and Ruan”, or just “Johan and Marietjie”. Where that may not be enough, add a line:

  • We love your little ones, but our wedding will be adults only. We hope you enjoy a night off.
  • Children are very welcome. There’ll be a kids’ table and a childminder during dinner.
  • You’re welcome to bring a partner. Please let us know their name when you reply.
  • Afrikaans: Ons is baie lief vir julle kleinspan, maar ons troue is net vir grootmense. Dankie dat julle verstaan. (We love your little ones, but our wedding is for grown-ups only. Thank you for understanding.)

Deciding who gets a plus-one is harder than wording it. Our guide to plus-ones and children at weddings helps with that part.

Next steps

Write the wording, then ask someone else to proofread every name, date and time, and ask both families to check how their names appear. Keep your signs and website in the same wording and language.

Tarika hand-paints welcome signs and seating boards in English or Afrikaans as part of our wedding styling, and the whole planning process can run in Afrikaans if you prefer.

Frequently asked questions

Whose name goes first on a wedding invitation?

On a formal invitation hosted by the bride’s parents, the bride’s name traditionally comes first, and only her first name is used because her surname matches the hosts’. When the couple or both families host, either order is fine, and many couples simply pick whichever sounds better read aloud. For two brides or two grooms, alphabetical order is a tidy way to settle it.

How do you word an invitation when a parent has died?

Name the parent who has died in the couple’s line rather than as a host, for example “Anika van der Merwe, daughter of Marietjie and the late Johan van der Merwe”. Hosts are living people, so the invitation itself comes from the surviving parent, both families or the couple. In Afrikaans, wyle does the same job: “dogter van Marietjie en wyle Johan van der Merwe”.

Can you send wedding invitations on WhatsApp?

Yes, and plenty of South African couples do, especially when guests are spread across provinces or overseas. Send each invitation individually rather than to a group, include the key details as text as well as an image so people can find them later by searching their chats, and give a clear reply date. For older relatives, a printed card is still a kind touch.